Brain Revelation

Brain fart? Not so much. Liar? No. Forgetful? Maybe. So busy and taking on more than she can handle. Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! We HAAAAVVE a winNER!!! I know, I know, I know. Last week I said I would have a new blog entry every Monday and it would appear Tuesday morning. Here we are the first Tuesday and you wake up to...nothing.

All I can say is best laid plans. The upside is it did get me on here today when I realized I messed up. In the past I would have put it off further, until I could "find the time". There's an interesting phrase; "find the time". Is it really lost? Where are we supposed to look for it? Did we put it somewhere & forget where we left it? That one works for me and most MSers, but I don't know.

My big New Years resolution was to take more time for myself and it would be "The Year of Tammy!". That worked a little at the beginning. I am still trying to get back to that goal. There have been some interesting wrinkles that have thrown it off course too. I just forgot that when we plan life always has a way of throwing you in another direction.

This time I am preparing for my MS Walk on April 28th in Bloomfield Hills, Michigan. This is not unusual, but I issued a challenge to myself and my fellow walkers. This year we need to step up our game and do more to raise money for the NMSS. My kids hosted a returnable can & bottle drive in our neighborhood. Our family is collecting loose change for the months of March & April. I am hosting a Family Game Night Fundraiser on May 18th at our church. This last one is proving to be a lot of work, as I anticipated, but it definitely keeps me busy!

Add to this, me being screened to participate in a MS Research Study/Clinical Trial (I'll give more details once I find out if I am accepted, some loose ends I am attempting to wrap up from last year on a past dispute & putting together a book of my poems with a "twist". It adds up to a whirlwind of chaos. This is before I even add daily things like brush my teeth and eat.

The thing is, I know I need to slow down. Pushing too hard can land me in the hospital or down for the count for a few weeks. I am attempting to pace myself. I still have managed to throw in a few phone dates with friends out of state and some coffee dates around home. I have made more time for the kids and I to play and cuddle. I had a rousing game of Trolls that involved a treehouse and a runaway boat going over a waterfall with my daughter Kristina this past weekend. It was a lot of fun and hearing her laughter and then her brother's when Paul came to investigate the racket I was making, was priceless and a beautiful sound. After an hour of this, I did fall asleep on Kristina's bed. She kindly covered me up & tiptoed away. Paul announced he'd wake me up and punched me in the stomach. Ouch! He means well. Surprisingly, he's usually the one who treats me with "kid gloves". Off day maybe?

I have been reading a book at night, which has been unheard of for me in the last 2 years. I'm reading "The Help" and it's really good. Sometimes, I can read a whole chapter & others one passage. I do like that this book will separate incidents within the chapter by putting several spaces between them. This way I feel like I can accomplish something before the fatigue pulls me under it's spell.

I started "My MS Yoga" again & even had my husband join me twice last week. It was really funny hearing him moan & groan over the positions. I kept having to stop to show him the right way to do it. He used to be such a health nut and was really into muscle training years ago. I was amused at the basics he forgot, like if a stretch hurts, you aren't doing it correctly. The second time, I saw definite improvements. I am trying to show him how his back can improve and have less pain by joining me. We shall see. ;)

I caught up on some of my TV shows and watched a couple of movies. I cleaned out a few drawers and had some chats on Facebook with some old friends & repaired some old wounds with friends close to home. I even have made some new friends along the way. I cleaned some things around the house that were bugging me too.

I actually feel better now. I felt as though I was completely off track with my "Year of Tammy" pledge, but I see now that isn't true. I am having my year of Tammy, but with all of the unexpected twists and turns that life throws are way. I have done many things I wanted to do this year. I may not have my "Schedule" written down to follow yet, or am I committing to it daily, but I am doing more than last year.

For me living with MS, I do need to keep taking my breathers and slow down. Health needs to be my number one priority because when "Mom" goes down, so does everyone else. I will take my moments of coffee with my neighbor or an old friend & yoga with my husband. Schedule a phone date or read a story to my kids. Watch a favorite show or a movie I love. Read a good book, or 2 pages, at bedtime. Put my feet up to take a nap or help someone I love accomplish their goal while we visit. Yes, I may be stretched thin at times, but I am doing more for me and in turn I am helping to show my loved ones I have time for them even more when I take the time for me. That's my Brain Revelation for the week! Now, go do something for yourself and do it guilt-free.